Cynthia wanted to start a business, but she struggled to get it off the ground. She reached out to a mentor who listened as she described her idea. Her mentor recommended that Cynthia focus on her word choices and reframe negative thoughts around her business.
When you want to start something new, like a business, charity, or special project, it can be easy to get overwhelmed and focus on the negative. But becoming aware of the language you use can be powerful and enlightening.
When it comes to your thought process, pay attention to the following negative words…
Always or Never
One of the quickest ways to spot negativity is to look for absolutes in your speech or thinking. For example, Cynthia frequently complained, “I’ll never have enough time to focus on my business and get it started.”
When you hear yourself use “always” or “never”, pause, and rephrase your thoughts. Instead of saying, “I always struggle to write papers for my professors”, try something more positive like, “I am learning to improve my writing skills while in college.”
I Hate or I Can’t
When it comes to reframing negative thoughts, pay attention when you hear yourself using hate or can’t. Hate is a strong word, and it can be an indication that something in your life needs to change. For example, if you say, “I hate running late”, ask yourself what you would have to do to stop running late. Do you need to get up an hour earlier? Do you need to prepare your lunch the evening before, so you have more time in the mornings?
Can’t is another word that should trigger serious reflection for you. When you use it, slow down and evaluate. Consider if it’s true that you can’t do this. For example, you might say, “I can’t try out for that modeling gig.”
But is it accurate to say that you don’t have what it takes? Instead, ask yourself, “Is this just fear hiding behind I can’t?” Don’t be afraid to get honest with yourself here.
If Only…
It’s easy to get caught up in the “If only” moments of life. You think, “If only my parents had stayed together” or “If only I had made different choices that day.” While thinking these things might make you feel good and give you a shot of self-pity, ultimately, they don’t help you.
Instead, they keep you trapped as you relive your past and wallow in negativity. When you hear yourself use the term, “If only”, pause and correct it by saying, “What’s done is done, I accept my past fully and completely.”
This can trigger uncomfortable feelings, and you may realize that you have to forgive people in your life for the mistakes they’ve made. You may also have to forgive yourself for the poor choices you’ve made.
At first, learning to reframe your thoughts may feel difficult. It’s natural to feel uncomfortable while you’re learning something new. But the more you do it, the more you’ll realize that reframing your thoughts can truly set you free.
At Spraguelet Wellness, we are all about long-lasting results – made through habits that work with your lifestyle and that you can actually stick to.
Let’s schedule a quick call to see if there’s anything I can do to help you feel more comfortable in your own skin. Message me today for a FREE Success Session.